The House Is Almost Too Quiet

I can hear myself think and it makes me wonder

I craved quiet for so long.

Boys are noisy. The endless laundry, constantly changing schedules, and the feeling that I could never catch up made me feel restless and constantly alert for the next thing.

And then the house got very, very quiet.

It’s different now

Some days I like the quiet. It feels like a gift. I can think. I can breathe. 

I have more time for myself to try new things.

I can be in bed by nine.  

Is it me or does it feel a little weird not to be needed on a daily basis? I had no idea I would miss it.

Here is something I have noticed in my own life and in the lives of the women I work with. 

For years, being a mother was the organizing principle of my life. It determined the shape and rhythm of my days. We based our year on the school calendar.  The first and last days of school determined two very different times of the year.  Drop off and pickup gave us a daily structure. We based our vacations, family get-togethers, weekends, and our meal plan around the school schedule.  

Now we’re starting over. And it feels a little wonky without that structure.

If you’re feeling like the life you built as a mother doesn’t fit anymore or your career no longer makes you feel alive, I see you. 

You might be wondering what to do with the time that used to belong to everyone else. You might be looking at your partner and realizing you haven't thought about what you want together. 

You might be reaching for your phone to check in on your college student. But don’t do it. It’s time to take care of yourself as well as you take care of others.

This is not an ending. It’s a beginning.

I want to reframe something for you.

A dear friend said something that really helped me. I was struggling with the idea of becoming an empty nester a few months ago, and she said: "This is the time when you can say yes to everything."

She was right. For the first time in a long time, maybe the first time ever, my time, my energy, and my attention is mine. I can do whatever I want to do.  It’s such a freeing feeling.

I think midlife, especially an empty nest, is the beginning of our next chapter.

How will you write yours?

Most of us have spent so long focusing on everyone else that we have genuinely lost track of what lights us up. We have been tolerating things we should have changed years ago. We have been running on empty, constantly updating our to do list, and telling ourselves we'll figure out the rest later.

The time has come.

You don't have to figure it out alone.

I do this work because I have been stuck. Then I made changes to find my path forward. I took one step at a time.

And I’m so glad I did. My life is more beautiful than I could have imagined.

I am the happiest, healthiest, most fulfilled I have ever been and I want that for you too.

It’s never too late.

Just take the first step.

Are you ready?

If any of this has resonated, I would love to connect. You can learn more about the work I do with midlife women on my coaching page, or book a Free Call to explore what’s possible for you.